Just Another Mundane Monday
Nerd-Talk
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Went into work. Checked the system logs as usual. The mail-filter server didn’t look too good. It could barely process any work over the weekend. It can’t cope with the flow rate of our incoming/outgoing emails any longer. It’s blowing its gasket. My prognosis: R.I.P.
I’m a Techie. My speciality includes building desktop PCs and servers (among other things). I have been building them since I was twelve years old. I can build them with my eyes closed and hands tied behind my back. Nothing special really. I'm sure there are gazillions of people out there with similar skills.
Today, one of my babies died. I called it ICF (Internet Content Filtering). It was a Pentium Pro 200 running with 256Mb EDO RAM and 4Gb HDD. I built it from spare parts. Two years ago, it was running quite happily processing an average of 700 emails per week. Today, it struggles to process roughly 2,000 emails per day. I had no choice but to decommission it.
Today, another baby was born. I called it ICF2, after its predecessor. It was built from spare parts as well, consisting of a Pentium III 650 with 512Mb PC133 RAM and 18Gb SCSI-2 HDD in Raid-1 array configuration. It runs quite happily now. We’ll see how it gets on for the rest of the week.
I’m such a nerd.
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Typical-Male
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The Admin Assistant was looking rather quaint today, with her bright pink jumper and tan trousers. Lisa is your average Essex-girl; average-height, quite waif, blonde, blue eyes, strong facial features, etc. speaks Lazy-English.
“What’s Lazy-English?”, I hear you ask.
Let me set your mind at ease. Instead of saying “computer”, the T is silent i.e. “compu’er”. Another example is “nutter”, becomes “nu’er”.
Sometimes you even miss a few words; instead of “Hey let’s go to Nelitos”, you say “Hey’s lets go Neli’os”.
Do you follow me so far? Nevermind.
“Ahmad, you still haven’t told me what you want for your Christmas Dinner”, she gave me a glare for across the hallway.
“And you better not say you’re not coming this year. You’re definitely coming!”
“Oh.. err.. Sorry. I’ll tell you by the end of the day ok Lisa?”, I gulped.
She just rolled her eyes, and walked away. You could definitely see her baby blue eyes from here.
In my head I was going, “Take me with youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!”
I’m such a typical bloke.
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To Sigh or Not To Sigh
-----------------------
Edward, my first assistant (or Number One as he likes to be called), walked into my office with a very disconcerting facial expression.
“Ahmad… err…”
“Yes Number One?”
“I think the Linux server in Hoddesdon just packed. Can’t seem to control it on remotely.”
“*SIGH* I’ll leave in about ten minutes. Let the users there know please, Ed.”
“Okay, cool.”
As I packed my equipment and walked out of my office, I saw Lisa again across the office handing out this month’s payslips to the staff.
“Hi Ahmad! Here’s your payslip!”, oh those lovely blue eyes.
“Errr.. my hands are a bit full at the mo…….”
“No worries. Let me put it here…”, she walked closer, slipped the payslip into my shirt pocket, brushing her soft hands against my chest.
“Oh-Errr.. thanks Lisa”, came out rather high-pitched for some odd reason.
She smiled and swiftly walked away.
Too bad she’s engaged. *SIGH*
I drove off to Hoddesdon for the day. I could feel my chest still tingling.
I’m such a sad git.
-----------
Went into work. Checked the system logs as usual. The mail-filter server didn’t look too good. It could barely process any work over the weekend. It can’t cope with the flow rate of our incoming/outgoing emails any longer. It’s blowing its gasket. My prognosis: R.I.P.
I’m a Techie. My speciality includes building desktop PCs and servers (among other things). I have been building them since I was twelve years old. I can build them with my eyes closed and hands tied behind my back. Nothing special really. I'm sure there are gazillions of people out there with similar skills.
Today, one of my babies died. I called it ICF (Internet Content Filtering). It was a Pentium Pro 200 running with 256Mb EDO RAM and 4Gb HDD. I built it from spare parts. Two years ago, it was running quite happily processing an average of 700 emails per week. Today, it struggles to process roughly 2,000 emails per day. I had no choice but to decommission it.
Today, another baby was born. I called it ICF2, after its predecessor. It was built from spare parts as well, consisting of a Pentium III 650 with 512Mb PC133 RAM and 18Gb SCSI-2 HDD in Raid-1 array configuration. It runs quite happily now. We’ll see how it gets on for the rest of the week.
I’m such a nerd.
******************************
Typical-Male
-------------
The Admin Assistant was looking rather quaint today, with her bright pink jumper and tan trousers. Lisa is your average Essex-girl; average-height, quite waif, blonde, blue eyes, strong facial features, etc. speaks Lazy-English.
“What’s Lazy-English?”, I hear you ask.
Let me set your mind at ease. Instead of saying “computer”, the T is silent i.e. “compu’er”. Another example is “nutter”, becomes “nu’er”.
Sometimes you even miss a few words; instead of “Hey let’s go to Nelitos”, you say “Hey’s lets go Neli’os”.
Do you follow me so far? Nevermind.
“Ahmad, you still haven’t told me what you want for your Christmas Dinner”, she gave me a glare for across the hallway.
“And you better not say you’re not coming this year. You’re definitely coming!”
“Oh.. err.. Sorry. I’ll tell you by the end of the day ok Lisa?”, I gulped.
She just rolled her eyes, and walked away. You could definitely see her baby blue eyes from here.
In my head I was going, “Take me with youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!”
I’m such a typical bloke.
*******************************
To Sigh or Not To Sigh
-----------------------
Edward, my first assistant (or Number One as he likes to be called), walked into my office with a very disconcerting facial expression.
“Ahmad… err…”
“Yes Number One?”
“I think the Linux server in Hoddesdon just packed. Can’t seem to control it on remotely.”
“*SIGH* I’ll leave in about ten minutes. Let the users there know please, Ed.”
“Okay, cool.”
As I packed my equipment and walked out of my office, I saw Lisa again across the office handing out this month’s payslips to the staff.
“Hi Ahmad! Here’s your payslip!”, oh those lovely blue eyes.
“Errr.. my hands are a bit full at the mo…….”
“No worries. Let me put it here…”, she walked closer, slipped the payslip into my shirt pocket, brushing her soft hands against my chest.
“Oh-Errr.. thanks Lisa”, came out rather high-pitched for some odd reason.
She smiled and swiftly walked away.
Too bad she’s engaged. *SIGH*
I drove off to Hoddesdon for the day. I could feel my chest still tingling.
I’m such a sad git.
posted by iJun at 10:34 pm
